What are you passionate about?  What lights your fire in life?   Do you feel ALIVE?   Are you tending your inner flame?  Are you experiencing the passion you want in your intimate relationship?


To live passionately is to live connected to an inner flame that lights your life up with meaning and purpose and gets you onto your feet, fully engaged. Each of us has interests, involvements, or topics that “get us going”.  We have places in our souls that fill us full of fire and enthusiasm, or anger and outrage.

Instead of trying to suppress these wild sweeps of energy within us, let’s explore them more deeply.  These ‘firestorms’ give us important information about our soulprint.  They tell us of our life calling on the deepest possible level, of needs and longings and causes into which we can pour our life energy.

Even negative or destructive passions are important. It is not unusual for our deepest wounds to be the source of fire that motivate us to work towards our own healing and then the healing of others.  Justice and advocacy work is often fueled by passion.

Intense attractions to another person can feel like we are being swept downstream. What is so compelling about this person?   What does being with them evoke in us?  What qualities do they carry that our soul is hungry for? What secret longing do they fulfill?  Do they represent something unlived in us?  How do we experience ourselves differently when we are with them?  And what is this experience waking us up to  the next phase of our journey?

Passion is important in our intimate relationships and yet so often in long term couple relationships the passion fades and we begin to live in a companionable and sometimes boring comfort zone.  Passion can be re-awakened when two people are ready to challenge the places where they’ve gotten stuck and stagnant.  People who are growing are new partners to each other each and every day and share an unfolding adventure together.  People who are passionately engaged in their lives make  more passionate life partners…at any age.  It starts by tending your inner flame.

Does living a passionate life require a partner?  Absolutely not!  While having a dream lover and experiencing being chosen, wanted and desired by a special person is something that most women long for, we can experience ourselves as whole, complete and desirable regardless of whether we have a partner or not.  My favorite book on this topic is Women and Desire: Beyond Wanting to Be Wanted by Jungian analyst Polly Young-Eisendrath.

The fire comes from within, and it is up to us to tend that inner flame.  Find ways to appreciate your sensual self, love and care for your body, explore your inner fire and connect with what brings your life deep meaning.  Don’t get stuck in waiting and in longing.  Today is the day to live passionately!

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